One of the most special moments I’ve experienced with my little girl, is when she has expressed aspirations to be like her mommy in some way or another. Like how she wants to practice riding, cleaning stalls, or wear blue jeans! Or the time she cut her hair so it “was just like mommy’s!” If that doesn’t warm your heart, I don’t know what does.
On the other hand, I have read countless blog posts ad scrolled past numerous Pins on how you should encourage your child be their own person! Make their own decisions! Aspire to be whoever they want to be, my child! I can just see the headlines. “10 ways to let your child spread their wings.” Or, “6 ways you’re getting in your child’s way.” I get it, I do. But,to tell the absolute truth, it makes my heart happy when my little girl gives a glimmer of wanting to be like me.
Lately, my heart has been heavy at times, because those moments have been less frequent.
I’ve been telling myself it’s a phase, with this being her first year in the public school system. She’s being exposed to many new types of women she never knew existed. As soon as she jumps in the car on the way home, her comments will range from, “I love Ms. so-and-so, she has super long, black, straight hair and she’s soooooo pretty.” or “Oooohhhhh look at so-and-so’s high heel shoes! I wish I wore shoes like that.” or “Her dress is so pretty. She always wears dresses. I love dresses.”
All of these attributes represent the complete opposite of who I am as a woman. My confidence in being a worthy woman to aspire to slowly fades with each gushing admiration.
So what’s a mom to do? Don’t worry, I won’t tell you the top 10 ways to make your daughter like you, because I don’t have an answer. And you know what? If I were her I’d probably feel the same way! What she doesn’t know, is her mommy would like to be like those women too, at times! Heck, I don’t even own a pair of heels!
So, I remind myself that the Bible says children are arrows in a parent’s quiver. They are to be nurtured, loved, and protected until the time comes to point that arrow in the direction GOD wants them to go, not me. My heart has been wrestling with the wrong agenda. God has entrusted this child to me and my husband, but she is her own person, made uniquely for God’s purpose.
No matter if she wears her hair up or down, chooses boots or heels, she’ll always be beautiful in my eyes. And something makes me think she’ll always have a love for horses like her momma. 🙂